Friday, March 26, 2010

17.Secrets in the Stable
     mystery

I gave Mrs. Carter a quick thank-you and flipped my cell phone shut before I could start bawling. I'm such a dork, I thought. Of course Lexi isn't hanging at home waiting to hear from me. She started trailing after that stuck-up Shannon Simpson before I even told her I was moving, so why would things be any different now that I'm actually gone?

5 comments:

  1. Loved the bawling. Wonder if there's a way to get the word could out of there. maybe just before I started bawling? anyway, just my opinion. Liked the hook.

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  2. I liked this, especially that last line. But I'm not sure about where the plot is going just yet. Hope that's address in the next few paras.

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  3. I would take of the I thought to put it in deeper POV

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  4. It took me back to junior high...The last sentence made me want to know more.

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  5. Hi

    I like how this ended - I'd want to read more - there are a myriad of complex situations already brewing in these few lines - great stuff!

    Thanks for sharing

    x

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